I offer counselling for Couples. For each couple the desired outcome may be quite different. For some its about saying goodbye whilst remaining good parents, for others it’s making changes to the relationship they already have.
For others it is to rediscover what it was that originally lead to each falling in love with the other and whether those qualities still exist despite life sometimes getting in the way. This could lead to a focus on everyday living and the kind of things that have lead to a sense of not being appreciated, acknowledged or valued. Sometimes it’s about hearing what the other person is saying. This may be challenging and it is often a process of separating the past from the present.
Couples relationship is about looking at the ‘whole’ relationship and separating the relationship from you as an individual. A relationship with another has it’s own needs, such as growing together and listening, hearing and understanding what the other is communicating.
This helps deflect blame and shame from the individuals involved and enables each party to discover where the relationship has got stuck and what its needs are.